(Time for some truth.)
There is much happening in the world today that feels chaotic and disordered.
A glossing of the headlines on the front page of most news outlets is enough to send shivers down one’s spine.
So today, rather than add to the noise, I want to keep things a bit simpler and invite you back to a profound home truth that I think can bring much comfort.
Before I get to that, there are a couple of questions I feel it’s important for all of us to ask ourselves. Firstly:
‘Am I doing enough?’
So many of us keep ourselves incredibly busy, with fully loaded schedules, to make sure that we can affirmatively answer this one. ‘Yes, I am doing enough.’ Alternatively, it may be that we answer ‘I am doing as much as I possibly can.’ And sometimes, our compulsion is so strong that we might even do so much that we unconsciously propel ourselves in the direction of the dreaded “burnout”.
Often, underneath it all, this over-DO-ing is to distract us from the deeper and more confronting question of:
‘Am I enough?’
And that avoidance is with good reason. It’s hard to answer this question because so much lies behind it. It’s a loaded question like no other.
When we learn early in life that we are not enough–maybe a parent walked out on us (or at least it felt that way due to family circumstances), maybe we were bullied by siblings or peers, maybe we felt different and that we didn’t belong–we find a way to cope. That is, we change ourselves to fit the life around us.
Gone unquestioned, lying in our subconscious, this belief can lead us to places that are out of alignment with the true self (a version of us that is beyond identity). Essentially, we become addicted to the DO-ing due to the meaning we make behind it.
Before I take you too far down the rabbit hole on that one, here’s that Truth I mentioned…
You are enough.
It doesn’t matter what you do or don’t do. It doesn’t matter what people are and are not saying about you. Behind all those messy expectations and judgments we place on ourselves and imagine from others, we each have a complete and whole human inside.
Nothing to fix. Nothing to prove. All you (and I) have to do, is exist.
Alan Watts said it well.
“Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth.”
Behind all the roles, the labels and obligations we place on ourselves, we are simply human. We are simply existing. Here and now. That’s it. That’s one of the simplest truths we can grasp. This is beyond identity, beyond values, beyond mission.
Water can’t get wet.
Fire can’t burn.
And you are enough. Exactly as you are.
That’s the correct way we should all view ourselves if we are to live a truly empowered and unlimited life. Yet somehow, it’s a belief that so many of us continue to wrestle with.
I am certainly not immune. I know the tricks my mind plays on me, yet I still try to “bite my own teeth” from time to time. Thankfully, it is no longer an existential compulsion for me, but something I can have self-compassion for when it does show up.
So with that, perhaps you want to put a hand on your belly and take a deep breath in, being sure to expand your diaphragm… feel your hand being pushed out, and now…
Let that shit go (whatever it is).
Felt good? How about another one? This time, slow the exhalation down even more, sigh it out.
It never fails to amaze me the profound effect one good quality breath can have. It allows the chaos to subside, even for a moment, and a moment can change everything.
A small but important side note… in case this has you wondering.
Accepting yourself as a whole and good doesn’t lead to complacency. Actually, rather the opposite. Knowing that you’re enough as you are and still choosing to create impact in the world through action is how we can go from striving to thriving.
A more peaceful, powerful and possibility-creating approach to life.
You don’t have to lower your standards. You just need to start with the knowing that you’ve already arrived, because you have.
Sometimes your ego will come back to dance with you, and that's okay. Make friends with it.
Happy Wellness Wednesday.
Not yet subscribed to Wellness Wednesday, your twice monthly email newsletter for profound insights into living well. Subscribe here.
Here are a few ways I can help you if you’re ready to engage in some targeted personal development:
Does your I AM ENOUGH muscle need a little work out? Perhaps you’d like to listen to my free I Am Enough audio meditation for a couple of weeks and see how that shifts things for you. I’d love to hear about your experience with this audio - please hit reply once you’ve had a listen. (Note: this is a NEW edit with binaural beats mixed into the track. IYKYK. Enjoy!)
Do you have some funky old beliefs that are no longer helpful floating about that could do with a tune-up? My Transformational Hypnotherapy offer remains open until the end of August 2022. Work with me 1:1 for 30-days and we will use the power of hypnosis and transformational coaching to shift one key element in your life.
Create more Peace, Power and Possibility in your life. Retain me as your confidante and transformational coach and we can work together 1:1 for 6 months to shift the obstacles between you and your next Big Life goal (even if you don’t know what that is yet–they seem to have a habit of emerging when you say YES to this deep personal work).